I am out of post ideas and have had A LOT of stuff on my mind lately, so I thought it might be time for another If We Were Having Coffee, or, my version of If We Were Having Tea, since I don’t drink coffee because it’s gross and makes me sick (too much information?? I overshare yet again). Anyway, this will be my first If We Were Having Tea of 2019, so woohoo! Enjoy, even though it’s probably going to be a little depressing.
If we were having tea…I’d tell you that as of the writing of this post, I’m reading KINGDOM OF THE BLAZING PHOENIX, aka sequel to the wonderful FOREST OF A THOUSAND LANTERNS, currently. Unfortunately, I’ve been kind of dreading picking it up every time I go to read for some reason? And it’s taking me so long? I don’t know why. I’m enjoying it fine, but it’s not *as good* as FOREST. Jade is just a boring character and doesn’t have a lot of nuance, and even though I shipped the ship, I predicted that it would happen at the end of book 1. Everything just seems to be happening too easily for Jade and I’m not feeling the suspense.
If we were having tea…I’d tell you my mental health has taken a downward spiral and I’ve been really depressed and kind of anxious lately. Things at my job are really stressful at the moment (we’re getting new carpets, it’s coming up on a year evaluation for me, etc.) and it’s hard for me to find anything positive about it when I’m at work, and then I come home after work and on weekends and stress more about work. I feel like I’m very much still figuring out what I want to do, and I’m not sure if my current job is it even though I do want to do library work in some way. The thing I hate most is working with adults, because I find the adults who come into this library very difficult to work with because they tend to be rude and aggressive. I’m trying to find things to be positive about and enjoy, but everything feels overshadowed by my job.
If we were having tea…I’d tell you my heart problems from a few months ago appear to be back, probably as a result of increased stress and depression. I’ve been having chest pain a few times lately but am going to the doctor very soon, so hopefully that will get figured out. I’ve debated going to the hospital a few times but feel like there’s not much they could really do because I know I have sinus tachychardia already (elevated heart rate) and that there’s nothing physically wrong with my heart and it’s anxiety related.
If we were having tea…I’d let you know I do have an interview for a job I REALLY really want and think I’d be excellent at. It’s still a library job, but I’d be choosing the books my library system buys for children, which would be such a good fit for me. I love books and researching books, and children’s books of all kinds make me feel so happy and joyful when I read them, and one of the things I really want to work on this year is bringing more joy into my life. I’m still so shocked I even got an interview, so hopefully I’ll ace it even though I’m really nervous because of how much I want this job.
If we were having tea…I’d say I’m so grateful for all of my new blogging friends that I’ve made this year. It’s so delightful and affirming to log in to so many lovely comments, and now that I have a new Twitter account just for blogging, I get to talk to you all more on there too and get to know everyone even better. The biggest thing that used to be missing from my blogging experience was feeling like I was part of the community, and now I feel like I do belong in the book community thanks to all of you <3
If we were having tea…I’d share with you the new Instagram account I started for my bullet journal! I’ve gotten really into bullet journaling over the past few years and have been wanting to experiment with Instagram more, but don’t think bookstagram is for me. I’m kind of debating making it my main account now because the other one is such a mess. Here’s a link.
If we were having tea…I’d tell you I’m…kind of losing interest in witchy things. I was really interested in it for a few months there, but now it seems to have fizzled out and I’m just not as excited about it? I’m not sure if I’ve genuinely lost interest or if it’s a depression symptom since I haven’t been enjoying much of anything lately. But I don’t feel much like posting witchy book things on here anymore, which I guess is fine since I didn’t do that many to begin with anyway.
If we were having tea…I’d say I’m excited for the rest of my January TBR. I’m 99% sure I’m getting STAIN by A. G. Howard, aka my most anticipated book of the entire YEAR, in a subscription box this month which I’m thrilled about, so I’m beyond psyched for that. I’m also interested in GILDED WOLVES, which sounds like it has a great cast of characters from what I’ve seen on the social medias. I’m looking forward to hopefully reading ENCHANTEE, which is also historical-but-magical Paris, later in the month as well.